McDonald’s
McDonald’s
Take-out: Yes
Accepts Credit Cards: Yes
Bike Parking: Yes
Wheelchair Accessible: Yes
Good for Kids: Yes
Good for Groups: Yes
Price range.
$ Price range Under $10
4 reviews
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Why am I not surprised when I got home and found out they forgot one of the sandwiches I ordered? Why am I not surprised to find out the only sandwich I got was missing the sauce on it? I take back I said previously, it's not typical McDonald's, it's just typical this location. I mean I've had better McDonald's experiences, I just need to keep continuing remind myself NOT to go to this location.
People, stay away.
It's 10:26.
Customer: Are you serving breakfast?
The McDonald's worker: No, we stop serving breakfast at 10:30.
Customer: It's not 10:30. It's 10:26.
The McDonald's worker: Then we stop serving breakfast at 10:26.
?!?!?!?!?!?!
A 4-star McDonalds?! Blasphemy on every level!
In fact, it's practically a 5-star McDonalds. (Someone, please take me Elite badge away because clearly I've lost my f***ing mind!)
How do I even begin to lay this all out and maintain any shred of credibility?!
Well, here goes…
First off, a big thank you to Bernie Sanders and his legion of fans for their incessant pushing of a $15 an hour minimum wage for a simple job I did better than most people when I was a mere lad of 15-1/2 years old. Thanks to all of you, the suits at McDonalds have installed the most impressive of machines – a touchscreen order taker and payment processor.
Oh, but it's so much more than that. In truth, McDonalds has installed a *Dream Fulfiller.*
Think of all those times you ordered a Big Mac and they chinced you out on special sauce. Think about when you were a little kid and you begged them not to put onions and mustard on your burger. Or how about that time when you were so high you wished no one was looking and you could just custom order something completely crazy?
Well folks, your ship has arrived.
Behold! 4 infallible, double-sided, touchscreen, "create your taste" machines, the equivalent of 8 ornery, pimply-faced, mistake-making, order-taking cashiers, just waiting to heed your every command. These machines will never say 'no.' They are Yes Men, through and through. Just tap your way to culinary delight and that $13 Big Mac with extra everything can be yours! The genie has finally escaped the bottle!
It's remarkable to see a brand I relished watching fade into obscurity suddenly make a resurgence back to total relevance. First, breakfast all day. Now this. Soon the machines will control everything and SkyNet (a wholly-owned subsidiary of McDonalds) will come online.
Our doom may be inevitable, but our final days on Earth will taste so, so good.
Three words: McDonald's Frozen Lemonade. Three more words: Great summer treat.